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Thursday, 25 August 2011

Freedom in Dublin

Great news

There will be 2 programmes starting in Dublin in September. Our first in Ireland!

Saturday, 20 August 2011

Clare’s Law and the Freedom Programme

Michael Brown whose daughter was murdered by a man she met on the internet is campaigning for this:
“Women who use the internet to seek boyfriends will win the right to force the police to reveal if they have a history of violence under plans being considered by Home Secretary Theresa May.”

I strongly support this move because it will give a message that at last society actually condemns violence against women. However I do not believe it should be limited to men who women meet on the internet.

Women need more information as well as  this law. We know that Dominators are very convincing and the women they  meet  need  to understand how they operate.

Clearly this is where the Freedom  Programme comes in. Women who complete the programme in its various forms say they can now recognize future abusers.

Friday, 19 August 2011

Access to the Freedom Programme

Overseas visitors can access the Freedom Programme by downloading ‘Living with the Dominator’ and ‘The Freedom Programme Home Study Course’ by going to my LULU page.   

In the UK, I recommend that all women who attend the Freedom also obtain a copy of ‘Living with the Dominator’ and the ‘Freedom Programme Home Study Course’ before they start the programme.  This will enhance their learning and keep them safe if they are unable to get back to the programme again. You can order the books from the Freedom Programme website or from Amazon.
These books will also give women a guide as to how the programme SHOULD be facilitated. The books present the programme as I would run it. It is a way of giving them a tool to exercise QUALITY CONTROL. I have no other way of maintaining standards.

Wednesday, 17 August 2011

My new blog

Thanks to my wonderful web master Joel for my lovely new blog.

Men who murder their female partners or former partners.

In my experience they ALWAYS plan this. It is usually a revenge attack because their partners are trying to leave them. They decide to kill then ‘wind themselves up’ until they are convinced that the victim is making them do this. They also kill the children for the same reason. There is a DVD clip in the ‘training’ section of my web site which explains this in more detail.

The people who looted and used acts of extreme violence across the UK in recent days followed the same process. They decided in advance what they were going to do then wound themselves up until they were convinced they had no choice and they were not responsible for their own behaviour. Much bolloxology has been aired in the media by people who do not understand the mechanics of violence. 



‘I recently split from my long term partner due to my unreasonable behaviour.
i have been reading your book living with the dominator and it has opened my eyes to just what a horrible person I have become.’



The Freedom Programme exists to provide information. I created the web site to do this. However I am only one person and I cannot respond to individual requests for advice by telephone. You can find contact details for your local programmes on the web site. You can download free chapters from 'Living with the Dominator' and the 'Freedom Programme Home Study Course'. You can also email me and join our discussion forum.

The cost of Freedom

When I wrote the Freedom Programme I worked for the Probation Service. They refused to let me run the programme so I was forced to leave the service in 2002. Now in 2011 I have lost 9 years wages. I also lost much of my pension. I have paid to print and publish the books and manuals and to set up the web site. I now have an income from training and book sales but I estimate that the total cost to me has been around £500,000.00. When I read the feedback from all of you who contact me to say the programme has changed their lives I consider that it has all been worth while!

Women's Aid chat room

I have just been reading some comments on the Women's Aid chat rooms. Some women were saying that they had been to a programme and felt patronised. That should not happen and when I train facilitators they are taught not to do this and I tell them to stick to my mission statement.

I devised the Home Study Course so that anyone who completes it will have the expertise and knowledge to evaluate whether the programme she attends is being run properly. I wrote the programme to empower the women who need it and not to make them feel stupid.

Pat Craven

Kindle version of Living with the Dominator

A KINDLE version of 'Living with the Dominator' is now available from Amazon - click here


I have just been in to the forum and read the latest discussions. I am so glad the discussions are working so well and that you are all helping each other. Keep it up!


It is very important not to lose sight of the fact that you did not do this to the children but he did! The other thing to remember is that you left when you could and if you could have left before you would have done so! You are not to blame. You did your best.

Online weekly tutorial

I am inviting anyone who is working their way through the Home Study Course to join an on line weekly tutorial to discuss each section. This is in the discussion forum. Please describe what you have learned and share your reactions. We are now on section 3. Next week we will move on to Section 4. I will move the topic to a new section every week and then start the whole process again for new students to join in. No one has posted anything yet but I will keep doing this in case anyone does.

At the beginning of July I joined the last session of the Freedom Programme with Brecknock Women's Aid. It was great to meet all the women and they really inspired me. They all had been given 'Living with the Dominator' and the 'Home Study' so later on I sent a message to them via the staff asking them to review it on Amazon.
Last week I ran a 3 day training event in South Shields and met some superb people. We had lots of fun and of course the play 'Lady in Red' was great as usual.

Whenever I run a training event or give a speech I try to get the message across that if I am a woman in an abusive relationship it does not mean that I am stupid, poor or an alcoholic! Can I also remind everyone that I do not want anyone on the training who does not understand the programme. If anyone tells me they are 'struggling' I will ask them to leave. Such people make judgmental remarks which distress the other trainees. Part of my function as a trainer is to protect all the survivors who are training to facilitate the programme.